New Years. Wow. This is one of my very favorite times of the year!

It's a fresh start!

A clean, blank page of your story!

This is a sweet gift from God to us: a brand new year, waiting for it's days to be filled!

SO dang sweet!

January 1st is such a fresh and new day. We are reminded in scripture that "His mercies are new every morning," and the new year is no different! God put in place rhythms and calendars for a purpose, and I do believe that He gave us the weeks, months, and years so that we have a way to mark our time. A way to look back and to look forward! And that is just what I am choosing to do at the beginning of this new year.

My theme for 2016 was GRACE. As with every year, 2016 was a year of mountaintop highs and seemingly rock bottom lows. My heart was filled and my heart was broken. I felt both joy and pain. There were times of incredible community and times of loneliness. Mountaintops and valleys, people. I saw them all. But what I also got to see was a glimpse into just how incredibly faithful, consistent, dependable, unswerving, unchanging, trustworthy and steadfast the God we serve is. I saw His grace. There was not one single time in my year, mountaintop or valley, that God did not use to drive me into a deeper (and so much sweeter) dependence on Him. He used my failures for His glory. When I was weak, He showed me His strength. He took me in my brokenness and allowed me to have a part in the glorious work He is doing around me. I was completely and utterly overwhelmed by His grace. And with that, I want to challenge YOU. To remind yourself of God's grace in your life this year (yes - even when your life seems hard, yucky and broken). Trace His hand of faithfulness. I don’t know what His grace has looked like in your life – maybe its shiny, new open doors or slammed-shut ones, maybe it’s healing or maybe it’s pain. But seriously, people. Do. Not. Miss. This. Our God is a God of abundant, overflowing, grace-giving.

And as for 2017... 

I spent a lot of time thinking about my 2017. One thing I know for sure is that it is going to be a BIG year! Not only will I finish up my second year of college, but I will also start my SENIOR year (weird, huh?). I have two internships lined up for the year - both of which I am over the moon excited for! Some things will be the same as 2016, too. I have the same, great job. The same, wonderful friends. And the same, loving boyfriend. I get to do life with the same, beautiful Shelby High School girls. A lot of same! BUT - I am excited for change, too. Excited for a couple new, fresh starts! A couple of exciting unknowns! A whole lot of good ahead.

For 2017, I made some goals for myself that I plan to stick to and reflect on often. Goals are my favorite! They help you to prioritize, dream and they set you up for a more intentional way of living! My goals include things like running a half-marathon (#kgrunsahalf!?) and starting (AND finishing) a book a month! But - more than goals, I have decided that I am going to choose to live my 2017 by a verse. 

Romans 12:1 - So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering.

This past summer when I was working at camp, my director read this verse aloud to us during the last few days of the summer. I stood there listening, leaning on the person next to me trying to give my legs a break from the morning. I was tired and fresh out of energy. Knowing that most of the counselors were feeling the same way, my director encouraged us to take whatever we had left, and give it right to God! He didn't tell us to rest up, so that we had something better to give. He told us to give Him our last bit of energy - every step, every conversation, every meal - everything we had. He knew we were spent, but He reminded us that even the little that we had left in us, we could offer to the Lord.

I think sometimes I fall into believing the lie that God doesn't want my "normal." I find myself feeling that what I have to offer on a day-to-day basis, just doesn't make the cut. What a silly thought! He doesn't just want my put-together, try-hard life - He wants the all messy, broken, and regular parts too. God calls me to lay down everything I have at the foot of the cross. To place my life before Him as an offering. And that is just what I hope to do during 2017! To begin each day reminding myself that everything I do is a chance to glorify, honor, and serve Him. My sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life is something that I can give to Him. I plan on re-reading this scripture often throughout the year, and spending lots of time in prayer - placing my whole life before God as an offering!

What are your goals, verses to live by, or words to hold onto for 2017?

Building Forts

This post was originally written
for Delight Ministries' Blog. 

When I was a little girl, I LOVED building forts. I spent my days constructing tiny (and oh so elaborate) homes out of anything that I could find. Stacks of pillows for walls, blankets for roofs, chairs as support systems. I channeled my inner architect, interior designer, and engineer all at once. Y’all – fort building in my household was no joke. As the child architect I was, I believed in extravagant and over the top. That included, but was not limited to, doorbells, windows that opened and closed, trap doors, and secret rooms. Sometimes, if I was feeling crazy, I would even venture into my backyard and collect the biggest sticks I could find and spend hours trying to balance them into perfect teepee formation (bless my 8-year-old heart). 

The building process was often long and frustrating (cue the tears when my whole masterpiece came tumbling down when I accidentally pulled on the wrong pillow). But, I think the part I actually loved, and what got me through the handiwork (or lack there-of), was the space of solitude the fort offered when I was finished. I would crawl through the small hole I left for a door, into a cozy (cramped) room – coloring book and flashlight in hand – and just be.

I was never a quiet kid, though, or even one who really liked to keep to myself. Quite the opposite, actually. I loved hustle and bustle. My house was utter chaos my whole childhood, and I loved it. Having two little siblings was enough to create a whirlwind of motion and noise in our small three-bedroom home. I thrived in that setting. I like to think I was made for a fast-paced lifestyle. But – deep inside of me – there was a little girl who craved quiet rest. I longed for a place that I could crawl into in the midst of a hectic day, and for my 8-year-old self that usually meant the two-foot-tall pillow fort that I had built earlier that day.

I look back on that sweet childhood and can’t help but wonder when and why I stopped doing this? When did I decide that I no longer needed a safe, quiet, all-to-myself place? Because let me tell you, life hasn’t slowed down - the chaos just looks a little bit different. Now, I am surrounded by the needs of people who rely on me. I am faced with a never-ending and always-expanding to-do list. My days are go, go, go and I am lucky if I get a decent amount of time to sit down and enjoy a meal. So – why did I stop taking the time to crawl into my fort? 

Because we are fully human, and not super-women (no matter how much we try to convince ourselves that we are), we are in dire need some sweet, sweet solitude. I can tell you right now we will not be capable of living the full lives that we want if we don’t understand the need for rest. And I’m not just talking about “let me take a three hour afternoon nap” rest; I’m talking about ”let me sit, quiet my heart, and lean into Jesus” rest. True, good for the soul, rest is not figuring out how we can empty our minds (binge watching Netflix anyone?) but giving ourselves a chance to fill our hearts with Christ – the giver of life.

Here is a truth that will set you free – choosing to spend some time with just you and the sweet Lord above is NOT selfish! Prioritizing your need for rest over the world’s need for you is not self-centered. Jesus emphasized this over and over in scripture. One time, Jesus sent His disciples out to do some hard work – kingdom building work. When the disciples returned back to Jesus, after doing what He had called them to do, the book of Mark tells us, “[Jesus] said to them, ‘Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.’ For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat” (Mark 6:31). The disciples were tired! They were worn out. Jesus didn’t look at them and say, “You need to do more.” He looked at them and said, “Come and rest a while.” How often do we find ourselves living the “no leisure to even eat” life? Even on those days, Jesus invites us (BEGS US) to come and sit at His feet and REST.

Sisters, start building your fort today. Seek out a quiet place where you can find refuge. A place where you can be away from the demands of the world and draw near to the Lord. That might be sitting on the twin XL bed in your dorm room or in a quiet corner of a neighborhood coffee shop. Wherever it is, whatever it looks like, find your spot! The spot where you can take the much needed and well deserved time to refresh your soul.

Just like the hectic and the chaos look a little bit different in my life now than it did when I was 8, so does the fort I build. Maybe it's less pillow walls and blanket roofs, and more time with a shut door and an open Bible.

To the Girl Who Has Had a Tough Week

This post was originally written for Delight Ministries' Blog. 

Can I be real with you all for a second? This week I cried a lot of overwhelmed, stressed-out, feeling-like-I’m-not-good-enough tears. It was just one of those weeks where I was feeling discouraged, beat-down, and broken. Don’t we all have those weeks every once in a while? The ones where we realize just how human we really are? I sure do. God has been showing me some cool things this week, so, sweet friend; let me share them with you.

We need to allow ourselves to be human!

Gals, I fully believe that our humanity is as much of a blessing as it is a curse. The fact of the matter is that we will have some JUNK in our lives on this side of eternity. All of us will - it’s unavoidable. God actually promised us that in His word. Let me tell you girls – that promise of struggle is REALLY frustrating to me. I keep waiting for it to end – I was sure that once I got to college most of my insecurities would be left in the dust. Well, that didn’t happen. I still struggle. As I grow up, I just realize more and more that I am nowhere near perfect, not even close! When I find myself being SUPER frustrated with my anxiousness and worry and any other not-from-God feeling in my life, I turn myself to some sweet scripture in 2 Corinthians 12. In this passage, Paul literally looks at God and says he will BOAST in his weaknesses because he knows God’s glory will be revealed in it.

In my life, this means believing that these hard and messy things I face have been filtered through Gods hands and allowed into my life with the ultimate purpose of driving me into a deeper and more intimate dependence upon Him. It means believing that even on the toughest days, when I literally pray 100+ times just to get through a class without crying, my dependence upon Him is sweet, NOT bitter. Honestly girls, it is FREEING to come to terms with this. It will completely change your perspective in the stuff that’s un-comfy. This dependence has freed me to accept that life is hard, embrace my humanity and allow myself to feel sadness or brokenness or disappointment – because that’s when I’m reminded of my constant need for Him. And really, I think that’s what God is after. Not our perfection or put-togetherness, but our hearts. All the realness, all the junk. He wants our dependence, our full and desperate attention. And let me tell you, I know I am fully His when I acknowledge and accept my humanity and desperately depend on Him.

Preach truth to yourself daily. 

It’s really easy for me to look at my friends and preach truth to them. You’re going through a hard week? GIRL, God’s got you – He is good at taking care of His kids. You’re feeling discouraged? Seriously, even those who faithfully walk with Christ go through deserts – hold onto the victory you have in Him! This is only a season. But, let me be really real with you – I am SO quick to exclude myself from these promises. I can look at God, recognize that He faithfully and lovingly lavishes grace on His kids – but somehow I consider myself exempt from that.

This week I started walking up to the mirror and preaching to myself. I know that sounds SO CHEESY – but it works. I look myself in the eyes in my bathroom mirror and start reminding myself of the big picture truth of the Gospel. That a perfect and loving God came down from His nice and lavish heavenly kingdom and literally went to HELL AND BACK because He loved ME that much. I remind myself that – as messy my life feels- nothing can change that truth. That same Savior – the one who walked out of the tomb – is drawing my heart nearer and nearer to Him daily.

All of that to say, I pray you ladies remember the hope we have in Christ. I pray that even in your deepest pits, you would remember that you are not for one second walking (or crawling) alone - and that even when you cannot see it, you serve a righteous, loving and powerful God who is fighting for you as you sit still in His presence.

To a High School Girl, From Your Young Life Leader

To my sweet and beautiful friends at Shelby High School,

I can't even begin to explain to you how much of a gift it is to be your friend, what a gift it has been for me to meet and get to know you over the past few months. I thank God over and over again for YOU. 

Thank you for not being too creeped out when a strange college girl came over and tried to talk to you in the cafeteria, in the carpool line, or at some random sports game. What is crazy and so incredible to me, is that on that day, each of those random and awkward introductions were ordained by God, and now, those "random" encounters are turning into lifelong friendships.

Please know that I love you. I will forever love you and will forever be praying that the Lord will continue to reveal his love to you. As I have the pleasure of walking through life with you, through successes and failures, love and heartbreak, joy and sadness, there are a few things I want you to know; things I hope you will never ever forget. These are things that I've learned in life so far and they are truths that have changed me from the inside out. Truths I constantly remind myself of, and they are true for you as well.

1. You are loved beyond measure. 

You are loved not because of anything you have done or will do, not because you have earned it or deserved it, not because of the way you look or how you dress, not because of your academic, athletic, or social performance, but YOU ARE LOVED because you are the beloved and beautiful daughter of God.  He created you; He has given you value, and His love for you will never waiver. He will never ever stop loving you, He will never give up on you, and He cares for you more than anything else in all creation.

“For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Romans 8:38-39

“You are my beloved Son (or daughter); with you I am well pleased.”

Luke 3:22

2. You were born to live a full life with Jesus. 

If I have learned one thing over the past years, it is that God’s plan is way bigger and way better than anything I could plan or imagine for myself. It’s scary to trust God and live life building and growing a relationship with a God you can’t always see or feel, but I promise that living life with Jesus is the best adventure you could ever have. Life is hard, and I would not have survived all life’s struggles and hardships without Him. He is the only one who has brought real joy, laughter, and hope out my life’s hardest struggles and pain; He wants to do the same for you and with you. Talk to him (pray), continue to read about his life and how he interacted with the people around him, and don’t forget that he wants to be a part of your life; he will always be there for you to turn to.

“I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”

Jesus speaking in John 10:10

3. You are imperfect and you will fail. 

It’s true, no matter how hard you try to be the perfect student, friend, girlfriend, sister, daughter, athlete, and one-day wife and mom, it will never happen. You will never have your life all together, but that’s okay. You, my dear sweet friend, were not made to be perfect; you were not created to have it all together. One of my favorite authors, Emily Freeman, says it beautifully, “You are not responsible to have it all together. You are free to respond to the One who holds all things in his hands.” Find freedom in knowing that you will never be perfect but that Jesus was and is, and He willingly shares His perfection with you. Rest in Him. Trust Him. He is the perfect one, after all.

“For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.”

Romans 7:15

“For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep doing.”

Romans 7:18-19

4. God has more grace and love for you than you have the ability to sin and reject him. 

God’s love for you is beyond compare; there is nothing as strong, as powerful, as confident, or as permanent as God’s love for you. And in his love there is grace. That means that God knows the worst of the worst things you have done and will do. He knows about when you betrayed your friends, your family, Him; He knows when you lie, cheat, steal, and disobey. He knows when you choose your own selfish desires over the feelings of others, and He has already forgiven you. He has already paid the penalty for all of the crappy things you have done and will do (a.k.a. your sin) with His death on the cross. Why? So he can be in a relationship with you, so you don’t have to be perfect anymore, and so you can rest and just live and enjoy life with him. Ladies, this is the greatest love story ever, this Man did and will do anything and everything to capture your attention and your heart. Give your heart to Him! He will take better care of it than any other boy on the earth.

“If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?” 

Romans 8:31-32

“For God has consigned all to disobedience, that he may have mercy on all.”

Romans 11:32

5. You are the Lord's. 

He did it all just for you; he came to earth, died on a cross, raised from death to bring you hope and prove His power. He created you in your mother’s womb, loved you before you breathed your first breath and has called you his precious daughter. He is working constantly for you, to bring you life, freedom, hope and joy. He wants to bring peace out of the war in your life, joy out of the sorrow, and love out of the hate. He wants to walk with you into the Promised Land, all you have to do is trust and walk with him. Let him fight for you. Let him bring hope and light and true beauty into your life. 

“The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.”

Exodus 14:14

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Joshua 1:9

“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

Jesus speaking in John 16:33

So my dear, sweet, and beautiful friends, this is why and how I have been able to love you over the past year. Jesus' love changed me life;  He alone gave me the boldness and courage to talk to you on that random (but perfectly ordained) day. He gave me all the love, life, joy and kindness to share with you. He gave me the strength to wake up early and have breakfast with you before 7am because he wanted YOU to know that you are worth it. You are worth being celebrated and being known. He wanted you to feel love, life, joy and kindness, and what a gift it has been for me, that I was chosen by him for this task.  My friend, I love you. With all of my heart I care for you and want to know you. I want so badly for you to see that you are important, not only to me, but to the God who created you.

With Love (and a large chunk of my heart),

Your Young Life leader,

Kieran